Lost Between The Trees.

yes, you.

I’m bored and I miss you.

wake up please?

sincerely, this guy who misses you like shit and wants to see your face right now.

p.s. You win, and I owe you.

Blah, blah, blah. Where is the face to face conversation nowadays…?

why is everything reserved for social networking now? I appreciate the bridge social networking has created for me in reaching out to places like California and South Carolina and so on and so forth, but at the end of the day, it’s so empty.

All the people I meet on the internet or text. Yet no conversations face to face. It makes me feel somewhat unsatisfied. Where’s the laughs over drinks, or random hangouts and stuff? Why does distance play into it?

And then those I actually know and have met before don’t ever hang out. Argh it’s annoying. It’s contradicting.

I just need a private jet or a magic carpet. Just fly around and hang out with anyone I felt like. Or at least get out the house.

someone ate my Twix bar.

alright, enough bellyaching.

I don’t feel like asking questions or reblogging anymore.

..I’ll just go investigate the pie in the kitchen and listen to Mayer Hawthorne & Murs.

I can…

sleep?

stay on Tumblr?

watch TV?

text people?

le skype?

I don’t know. I’m in no mood to do any of these.

Music shall be my savior tonight.

I think I’ll try sleeping BEFORE 12:30 for once.

I don’t know where my mind is really right now. I feel as though I’m in a floating, drifting stage at the moment. I feel relaxed yet sore, rested yet weary, right yet wrong.

I’m really trying to grow. And I’m not trying to force it.

I just feel myself filling with a myriad of emotions and the way I perceive things is really beginning to change. The way I view my friends, my family, my love for this woman, and the way I view myself is beginning to sort of, sift from the sand now, if you will. I’m starting to lose uncertainty around me.

At the same time, I still make unsure habits apparent. Not out of nervousness, but out of habit. It bothers me. Because I know I’m wrong, yet right. It’s bad habits that subconsciously make themselves apparent at the most inopportune time. I want to drop them so bad, lose them, and bury them somewhere. I know it takes time, but I want it to be vacated from my mind.

I’m tired of being a doormat as well. I’m beginning to take things by the reins more, but people still try to take advantage of me. I hate it. And at this stage, as much as I care about others, so much so that I put my happiness on hold, I can’t do it anymore. It’s wearing down on me. People don’t deserve it. I’m not the person to make character calls, but I know when some people deserve genuine kindness, and when some just use it. Being used is not a good feeling. So I’ll just kill that noise now.

I’m trying not to be down so much anymore. I have so much to look forward to. So many happy things in life. I have no need to look at the bad, the drab, every time. Another habit I need to drop. I have so many reasons to smile. So I need to.

That’s all for tonight, though.

and an even better night.

I feel numb…a good numb. It’s like a high with no drugs.