Taking a break from making music while I get back into theory and teach myself some new things. My stuff isn’t where I want it to be, and I want to get better, not just throw out half-baked stuff, even if it’s for fun.
I feel compelled to write something, but I’m not sure what, exactly. So I’ll talk about being out on my own since driving across the country.
Since moving to the Los Angeles area, I’ve had fun. It’s nice here. I miss the seasons and the east, but that’s okay, I’ll probably be in NYC at some point.
I’ve had the opportunity to hang with some neat people out here in California (don’t judge my use of the adjective ‘neat’) and have had the chance to do some fun things (film screenings, late-night churros, art galleries, vinyl shopping, visiting the Bay Area, etc.)
Living a decent distance from the city does suck, especially when I hang late in the city, and staying with family does have its drawbacks (outdated thinking on their part, stubbornness on my own part) but I do what I can.
The job search has, more or less, not been fruitful. I haven’t been here that long, but it sucks to go on interviews weekly and get turned down. Something will come soon, though, so no fretting on my part.
The one thing that does eat at me while I’m here is missing my mother. The single-parent, only-child family dynamic is hard to lose when you move to the other side of the country. Sure, we weren’t best friends, but I worry about her more since I’m not readily available to come to her aide if anything happens to her, which wasn’t an issue when I was in Brooklyn. Guess the worry comes from losing so many close relatives over the past few years.
I’ve been praying more since I came out here. I spend a lot more time in silent mediation and reflection, getting myself together.